“No running!” “You need to sit on your bottom.” “Where are you supposed to be?” “Why didn’t you use the bathroom before you came to recess?” “This is a clump…where is your line?” “You DO NOT throw your stuff away until you have been dismissed!” “You NEVER bring the ketchup to your table…take your tray to the ketchup’”
Have you spent much time at your children’s school? Have you been to the lunch room, or stood in the hallways first thing in the morning? If so, some of these statements may sound all too familiar to you. If you haven’t had the opportunity to stand in rank with your children, take a second, and feel the emotional depth of these comments. Due to a lot of different reasons, I have spent the majority of the last three days at school with my kiddos. The institutionalism of my children has struck me to my core. Can you imagine being a nervous and overwhelmed first grader or new kid to the school? Can you imagine the further frustration that you feel after being barked at while you are just trying to take it all in? I understand the need for rules…I really do. But do schools impose rules for safety or is it a “maintain order at all costs” attitude? My heart has been struck with this question. I watch how the older kids walk and talk, and I realize that they are trained to loose their individualism, they are trained to become “part of the whole”, they are trained to think the “school way.” It makes me really sad. I would never allow one of our home nurses talk to our kids this way. I would confront my husband or parents if they were dealing with my kids in this manner, and I would expect that they would all do the same for me. How do I reconcile the difference between my heart philosophies and they philosophies of the school? I do all I can, but it is not enough. Our children are not being treated much differently than any other public institution whether that be a nursing home, prison, or hospital. What ever happened to letting kids be kids? What ever happened to loving on kids being our first priority? Why not show the kids that you care about them? Why not take the time to understand that they may be sitting on their knees because they can’t reach the floor!
I know it sounds like I am preaching from atop my soap box, and in some of your eyes, I am. That is alright. I encourage you to find the time to be in your schools. Not just on parent night, but randomly sit in on your kids day. You may be surprised to find out what is going on! Demand that respect not only be shown by the children, but also to you children. Your kids don’t have much of a voice but you can be a voice for them.
***I am sure that there are those of you who LOVE your school and have a different experience. I apologize for the generalizations, but please remember that this is what my family is experiencing. I have a feeling though that we may not be the only ones!
Anyhow, please know that we are surviving our first week of school. Jamahl is enjoying his teacher and besides being really mad about getting only one recess this year, seems to be transitioning to fourth grade fairly seamlessly. The girls are in first grade which brings along a whole day and lots of other changes. They have a wonderful teacher who is the bright spot in my time there and the nurse that takes care of Keyan is really making Keyan’s days as good as she can. I am so thankful for these two ladies. Keyan is attending just part time right now and hopefully we can build up her endurance to the point where she can stay the whole day. My transition to having no one home hasn’t really happened yet because I have needed to be at the school for most of the morning, than I am volunteering all week in the lunch room to help the first graders get a handle on eating at school, and than I pick Keyan up at 1pm. So, in a few weeks, I will let you know how I am dealing with an empty house….stay tuned!
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